All The Single Ladies...

All The Single Ladies...

August 17, 2018, I was single as a Pringle and less than 24 hrs later I was about to meet the man of my dreams. Yes, that’s right, I MET my husband around this time, last year. I know what you’re thinking, why didn’t I tell you sooner? To be honest, I didn’t know I needed to. It wasn’t until the other day when I saw the sweetest post on Instagram dedicated to singles. It said: “You will find someone. It will happen for you. Enjoy being single, it won't last forever.” and that’s when it hit me...all of it, everything!

All of a sudden I remembered how I felt when I was single and it seemed as though NO ONE wanted me. I remember wishing, hoping and praying that someone would give me some kind of solution or comfort for my situation. People would always tell me to "enjoy the single life" but, that was difficult to do when I felt hopeless. After reading that post on Instagram, old feelings hit me, an epiphany hit me, sympathy hit me and I realized I needed to tell this story.

On August 18, 2018, I was headed home from Nashville after conducting interviews at the Black Music Honors. I got to meet and interview some amazing and legendary people like Bobby Brown, Dallas Austin, and Faith Evans as well as some up and coming legends such as Jonathan McReynolds, Koryn Hawthorne, and Kierra Sheard. This wasn’t my first time interviewing major stars, being on the red carpet or even mingling with some of the people at this event, but it was definitely a night to remember. After the show, I went back to my hotel room with my dad and sister (aka my boss and co-worker) to pack-up and get ready to catch a flight the next morning back to Las Vegas.

After packing and settling in bed, I started experiencing this overwhelming frustration about my “relationship status”. I felt like no one (romantically) loved me and I would never meet a guy who did. For 4 months leading up to that day I was completely focused on myself and my relationship with God. I felt like I was on top of the world! I was working out every day, keeping up on my “self-care” routine, focusing on the things God had given me to do, catching up on all my shows, eating healthy, etc. I knew God had something great in store for me, so I was doing my best to be strong, but it was starting to weigh on me.

The night before I went back to Vegas from Nashville, I became a bit emotional. I felt as though I always got the short end of the stick and I definitely didn’t feel loved. Around 3:00 the next morning I was preparing to leave the hotel to catch a 5:00 am flight when I got a message from someone who grew up with a really good friend of mine. He was from Louisiana and seemed so nice. He was a church-going man, saved, loved his family, HANDSOME, kind, thoughtful, name it! I asked if we could chat on the phone when I arrived back in Las Vegas and he agreed! Unfortunately that day something went wrong with the plane and I had a major layover. What was supposed to be a flight that got me home around 10:00 am, ended up getting me home around 11:00...PM!!!! I was stuck all day and I didn’t want to talk on the phone from the noisy airport, so I waited until I got home. I wasn’t sure if he’d wait up for me because we already had a time difference between us, not to mention we both had to be up for church the next morning. I ended up calling him when I got home and to my surprise, he answered! My original intent was to tell him that I wasn’t interested in getting involved with anyone right then, but about 5 minutes into my explanation I lost my train of thought...I knew, right then that this man was my husband. Not in the “I THINK he’s the one” or “He’s so cute I want to marry him” or “MAYBE he’s the one” type of way either. I had a deep assurance and peace that came over me letting me know that my husband had found me. Immediately after that, I gave up on my whole story and we started to get to know each other. We learned that we have very similar interests, upbringings, ideas, plans for the future, goals, and everything in between. It was crazy to think that less than 24 hrs prior I felt that we’d never meet and here he was.

After staying on the phone for about 3 hours, we finally decided to call it a night. All of a sudden I was living a fairytale. 18 days later, the Lord spoke to me in prayer and gave me specific instructions about my marriage, my husband and the love He would give us to share in our relationship. I wrote down what He told me and tucked it away in a safe place. I didn’t tell him any of this because I knew that God would take care of it for me. Just 20 days after that, we met in person for the first time along with my family (which was pretty impressive) and 3 days after meeting him, he proposed. I was in shock!!!!! I was so thankful because God made me a promise and He manifested it in the proper timing. Any sooner or later and things may not have been the same!

Here we are a year later, married, constantly deepening our love for each other and our love for Christ, inspiring others around the world and walking in purpose together. We call each other our “Purpose Mate.” Just this past weekend we had the privilege of speaking on a panel with other married couples as well as those who have a desire to be married about walking in purpose and following God. Our relationship is not perfect, nor do we try to make it seem that way. Anything worth having is always a work in progress. What I've learned is that the important thing in a relationship is having the same goal, same heart and being able to laugh off the small stuff! 

I didn’t share this story with you so you could start searching for a man, I didn’t tell you this to brag, I didn’t even tell you this because it was just something good to blog about. I shared this with you because I believe the Lord placed it on my heart to do so. I pray that you will keep the faith on your journey to being found by love. God is ordering your steps which means that every single day, you’re closer to your destiny. Being single and feeling alone is very difficult, especially when you can’t talk about it with anyone or share how you feel. I want you to know that it’s going to be okay.

When God blesses you it’s going to be solid...not “perfect”, SOLID. Since I met my husband, I have literally never felt the way I felt the night before we met. He makes me feel loved, appreciated, supported and pushes me closer to God each day. I want to encourage you not to give up on love. Sometimes you may feel like there’s no hope for you, but you should know that that’s a LIE!!!! Enjoy the time you have now to be single. Put your hands to work for the Kingdom of God, build others up, save your money, enjoy GENUINE friendship, spend healthy time alone, appreciate everything that you have, go after your passion and MAKE A NAME FOR YOURSELF!!! If you do this, when you get married you’ll be able to look back and appreciate yourself for all the good times you had. On the other hand, your mate will appreciate you for taking care of what’s his.

I love you and I know that you are such a beautiful person inside and out. I want to see you thrive, not because of a man but because of your relationship with yourself and your love for God. Your blessing is on the way honey, keep the faith!

Don’t be discouraged sweetie, you are a diamond in the rough and though it’s ROUGH when you come through it all you’re going to shine. Stay strong and stay focused. God is hiding you in the shadow of His wings!

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